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Thursday, November 18, 2010

Cowboys, Nancy Boys and Po' Boys: Random Musings for 11.18.10

Some random musings as I dream about the Oyster Po Boy I’m going to be devouring in a few days . . .

Have you noticed all the trick plays that have been popping up on YouTube and elsewhere? Hell, the other night Ohio State coach Jim Foster called a fake timeout, the LSU's girls started walking to their bench, and a Lady Buckeye made an uncontested layup. God knows I'm old school, but is that really how you want to win a game? By pulling a fast one on your opponent? Am I stupid to think a win has more meaning if you actually outplay somebody head-to-head on the court? Has the world gone crazy? Am I asking too many questions? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why is LeBron so pissed? Why can’t he understand the reaction of fans who now view him as an egotistical, immature, spoiled, self-centered multi-millionaire? How can he not see this? Why does he feel so put-upon? I’ll tell you. Because he’s surrounded by back-patting, glad-handing, blood-sucking leeches who hang on his every word and crack up at every joke he tells. Bron-Bron can do no wrong, kids. Ever see that Elvis documentary where they film everything, including a bunch of behind the scenes stuff? You know, where Elvis mumbles some lame joke and everyone in the room acts like he’s fucking brilliantly hilarious? That’s LeBron’s life.

And I know the Heat will end up winning 55 games but it sure is fun watching them struggle early, ain’t it? People are finally figuring out that it takes a TEAM to win basketball games. Remember the Lakers of a few years ago with Kobe, Shaq, Karl Malone and Gary Peyton? How soon we forget.

Finally, when I got over my disappointment and anger it wasn’t surprising that LeBron “took his talents to South Beach.” In the culture of AAU isn’t that what you do? Just go to the team with the best players? Sure, Michael, Magic and Larry would have never made “The Decision,” but that’s why they’re in the rare air that LeBron will never, ever, breathe.

On a related note, I recently read that within 15-20 years high school athletics will cease to exist as we know it, that everything will be club sports similar to AAU. Sadly, this makes perfect sense to me. School administrators will love it because they’ll have no equipments costs, no transportation costs, no liability, and best of all no bitching parents. Parents will love it because every kid will have a team and, best of all, nobody will get cut. Billy’s not good enough to make the AAU All-Ohio Red Squad? No sweat. Billy’s dad just starts his own team! Hell, he played on his intramural team, he knows basketball! And just think, none of those annoying High School Athletic Association’s “Rules & Regulations” to worry about. Everybody will be better off without having to get worked up about, you know, getting passing grades or behaving on the court, silly stuff like that. After all, it’s all about “having fun out there,” right?

Good Lord.

Oh, I know Mike Vick is playing great, everybody deserves a second chance, blah-blah-blah. Bottom line, I love watching great athletes but I also hate people who kill and torture dogs. Sorry, but throwing dogs in water, electrocuting them and watching them die is not my idea of a bitchin’ time. You gotta remember, I’m a guy who still can’t think of his little Scottish Terrier without tearing up, and she passed over 2-years ago. Guess I’m a softie. Screw you Vick.

And how ‘bout them Cowboys? They absolutely blow their first seven games and suddenly remember how to play a few days after getting a new coach? Them Cowboys must be a fragile bunch. I’ve never liked Wade Phillips, but his team quit on him, simple as that. Or are we supposed to believe that Jason Garrett’s game-plan and new “disciplined” approach made the difference? Don’t think so. They simply decided to play.

You know who makes me sicker? The Bengals. Marvin’s laid-back approach is killing me, and Carson Palmer is acting just like his head coach. What I’d give to see him grab Ocho Stinko by the facemask and tell him to get the hell off the field. This “professional” and “business-like” approach has got to go. Get pissed for once, dammit.

Don’t even get me started on Brett Favre, Randy Moss or Albert Haynesworth. Jesus.

I have no idea what to think of the football Buckeyes. I don’t know if they’re any good or not. None.

Most of you know I coached a team from Montserrat that visited the USA last month. It was a hell of a week, lemme tell ya. I’m in debt forever to Coach Tressel and all he did for the team. The tour of the Woody Hayes Center, Ohio Stadium, weight facility, meeting Terrelle Pryor, private 30-minute talk to the team from Coach, it was just an unbelievable, once-in-a-lifetime experience for the guys. Add the visit to OSU hoops practice, West Virginia practice, and all the games played and the dinners attended and it was unforgettable for all involved.

Speaking of hoops, I’ve watched both OSU and WV practice and I’ll say this – WV is underrated (look out for Kevin Jones!) and, although they’re ranked #5, so may be the Buckeyes. They’re deep and very talented.

How sad am I for Greg Oden? Very. I hated to hear the news of his latest injury. Still, you can call me a fool but I still think he’s going to be an impact player in the league someday. Then again, I also was convinced LeFraud was going to stay in Cleveland.

That’s it, I’m out. As of next week I’m taking my talents to the Outer Banks. That Po Boy awaits.

1 comment:

  1. That first paragraph made me spit out my coffee and I wasn't even drinking any.


Man, that chick beside me is smokin'.

Imagine waking up and seeing this on ESPN. I look like I'm having a stroke back there. Good Lord.

Imagine waking up and seeing this on ESPN. I look like I'm having a stroke back there. Good Lord.

3:30 AM, after the Louisville game.

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